for the sake of timeco.... FANGIRLS (and fanbois) everywhere!

hehe. random dribble of JJ Harkness and Quincy Verta in the aftermath of the 11th doctor announcement.

pretty funny. includes sex that isn't explained nor described in great detail.

and a man worries about the size of his penis.

i call this dribble "Continuity Errors"

enjoy.

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 Down in the basement of the Torchwood Archival Institite, there is an

office. On the door to that office is a strip of silver duct tape. Printed hastily on

that strip are the words "TIMELINE CORRECTIONS" in childish handwriting.

Below it are scrawled rather amusing stick figures in compromising situations.
 Beyond that door is a small, generic waiting room, with a desk. At the

desk is a orange skinned woman this week, her purple hair pulled into a bun. She

wears glasses, and is constantly filing her nails. There are numerous phones on her

desk, none of which happened to ring at all for the last week and a half.
 Behind her and her desk is another door. Once more there is a strip of

silver duct tape stretched diagonally across the frosted glass window of it. The

title and name of the man who worked out of that office was scribbled in that

same childish print. Commander J.J. Harkness was his name.
 And past that door, in the small, dirty, unorganized office sat the man

himself. And straddling his lap half-naked was his assistant, Quincy Verta.
 On the desk, which Quincy was firmly pressing his back against the

edge of, there were papers and folders. Two empty cups, and a pot of tea from

the planet Aphronesia. Their experiment with the newly arrived package was going

much better than the commander and his assistant were expecting, as they were

learning a great deal of the side effects drinking the alien concoction caused.
 Also on the desk were three phones. A black phone, for normal day to

day business. A red phone for emergencies. And a blue phone. Of the three

phones, only the blue one never rang. Not even a blip.
 So imagine the busy pair's surprise when first the black phone, then the

red phone rang. The two phones were ignored, of course, in favor of completing

the experiment.
 Eventually, they stopped ringing, and the two were left once more to

observe the effects the tea from Aphronesia were having on one another. And

quite intriguing effects they were.
 After some time, the phones began to ring again. By this time, the

commander and his assistant were no longer seated in his big, cushy desk chair.

They had moved to a much more comfortable place to conduct their experiment,

the small sofa upon which the commander often slept when he didn't feel like

leaving his office.
 "We should probably get those," Quincy mumbled half-heartedly.
 "Nah. Let the secretary get 'em again," the commander mumbled into

his assistant's chest.
 The phones did stop ringing, and once more, the pair were left to their

own devices.
 Until...
 The unmistakable sound of the Blue Phone rang.
 "We really need to get that one," Quincy said but his voice didn't

sound much like a protest at all. "It's probably the end of the universe if we

don't."
 After a minute, the commander muttered something under his breath,

climbing up from the couch and his assistant to answer the phone.
 "This better be fucking important!" he snapped angrily when he had

answered it.
 His assistant rolled over, propping his head up with his hands and

watched him as he suddenly went silent. Then nodded.
 "Continuity error?" he asked. "What kind of continuity error? Are we

talking a random purple Dalek in a scene with gold ones? A Martha Jones

wardrobe and hair incident?"
 Quincy watched as his boss's face drained of all color. He knew there

would be no further fun with the effects of tea sent from a planet of carnal

pleasures tonight. He sighed, getting off the sofa and pulling on his trousers.
 "No. It can't be. What about the adventures of River Song and the

Doctor? I mean, let's be honest here. They can't just introduce a character, have

her have a wonderful life with the man of her dreams, and describe him as an older

version of David Tennant only to completely rip off the fans by jerking him away

with no explanation as to how to repair the plot."
 Quincy muttered under his breath, fastening his pants.
 "Of course. I'll repair this problem personally.... No, thank YOU Mr.

Davies."
 He hung up, looking back at his assistant who now was once again

fully dressed. "What? I was comming back!"
 "Sir," he said, offering the commander back his pants. "I think next

time, we try the different flavors of Aphrodesian tea in my bunk, not your's."
 He tried not to laugh as the commander hopped around, pulling back

on his pants and relating the information he had learned to his assistant.
 "So what are we supposed to do about it then?" Quincy asked, clearing

up their tea and shaking his head at the waste of good beverage.
 "We're to first kidnap Doctor 10.5, drag him kicking and screaming

into this universe, kill the 11th Doctor, and then hang Steven Moffat for making

such a hideous choice in successors."
 "Why? I think it's good to bring in a new actor from time to time.

Otherwise it gets stale and-"
 "MY father was Doctor 10-inch. If they change actors before I'm ever

born... well... you see the dilema. Do YOU want to see this," he said, pointing at

his trousers. "Go from a size 10 to a size 6?" He shook his fist at the air. "For the

sake of my awsome timecock, and for the love of fangirls-"
 "And fanboys. Don't forget the fanboys."
 "Yeah, them too," the commander said. "We MUST stop this

regeneration from happening! Come, my minion! To the SUV!"
 "Wait wait wait a damn minute here!" Quincy said, setting the tray of

two cups and a teapot back down on the desk and putting his hands on his hips.

"Since when did we use an SUV? I thought we used a Chula Time Ship."
 The commander scratched the back of his head. "Eh... BBC budget

cuts. But it has blue lights and is all sleek and roomy inside."
 "I am NOT going to be a cliche," said the tea boy as he stormed out of

the office, annoyed.
 "Alright alright!" the commander called after him, following. "We'll take

the time ship! But we'll have to cut back on the coffee supply for a while!"
 "SUV it is then. I'm driving," Quincy snapped before leaving the

waiting room portion of the office.
 And the orange skinned secretary just shook her head and continued to

file her nails.