a random dribble while al's cooking dinner

 "Daddy, I have a question."
 "Yeah?" he said, stirring the pot of soup as he switched the phone to his other ear.
 "Well... I've been trying to figure out something, and I don't think I understand."
 "Spit it out love," he said, raising his shoulder so he could keep the phone against his ear as he opened a jar of parsley.
 "How was I born?"
 "Simple," he said nonchalantly. "Yer mum had a cesarian."
 "Yeah... I know," Nessa said. "But I mean... _how_ was I-"
 He smiled and added some of the herb to the soup before picking up a jar of thyme and repeating. "Well, when mommies and daddies fall in love-"
 "Not that. Come on, daddy," she said laughing. "I'm 27 years old. Throw me a bone here."
 "You want the honest to gods truth?"
 "Yes. Please, because I can't quite figure out how two men-"
 "AL!" Sam shouted from the dining room. "Is dinner ready yet!"
 "Hold on a minute love. Sam's bitchin again," he said, grabbing the phone and holding it against his chest. "IN A MINUTE YA OLD BASTARD!"
 "Come in here and say that again jackass!"
 Al sighed and continued stirring the soup as he returned the phone to his ear. "I can't really explain it right now. I'm in the middle of fixing dinner."
 "Well, I kind of figured since it's like, what, 6 o'clock there and uncle Sam's screaming," she said with a giggle.
 Al nodded. "Check your e-mail tomorrow morning, hun. It'll tell you everything you ever wanted to know."
 "You're the best."
 "I know," he said. "But don't tell your mother that. He'll have a fit."

 And so, when Nessa Rose sat down to check her e-mail that morning, the "explanation" she received was a poor cut-and-paste job of two anatomical charts put together in the most strange, disturbing, and disgusting way she could have ever pictured.
 She was vomiting for weeks and vowed to never ask her father for any answers concerning things like that ever again...

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author's note: the "chart" in mention actually exists, and was put together by the person who was rping Randy, al's then husband and "mother" of his two children, at the time. it was created as an explanation for MPreg in the RP. you can see the disturbingness for yourself: http://img126.imageshack.us/img126/9453/untitled9mn1.jpg