Temothy’s Neighborhood

If memory serves (which it may not) the Pastafarian (Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster) holiday of "Holiday" started at midnight and runs to, or through, Jan 1.

May you be touched by his noodly appendage!

Fsmlight1024

• I was exhausted last night. Got home from work at midnight but couldn't sleep because my brain wouldn't shut up.

• I decided to read. I finished "Confederacy of Dunces". then my brain wouldn't shut up about "Why do people like that book?! I mean, seriously, someone needs to name ONE good thing about it - cause I found NONE." Man, I hated that book. Really, what did the rest of you see in it that I didn't?
  

• I took sleeping pills at 4am
  

• Which made my goal to wake up at 8a pretty much impossible. When my alarm went went off, I reset it for 9a

• Then for 9:30a

• But the neighbor's housekeepers showed up around 9:05 and, as usual, made so much noise that I went ahead and got ready for work.

• Despite hell traffic, I got to the office at 11a. Hoped to leave around 3 but I knew that wouldn't happen.

• I didn't know that I'd end up working, doing a lot of complicated paperwork, till 6pm. I still had more to do but I was brain fried.
  

• Remembering that I hate everything I own (or it doesn't fit), I stopped to buy something to wear to a club party tonight (Nicole and one/some (??) of her students will be pole dancing and I was put on the VIP/guest list) - a club party in The OC (where everyone is tooooo fabulously cool to interact, so why was I even thinking of trying to look "good" or fit in?)

• I hated everything the store had but bought 2 dresses anyway (as expected, one that was really really really boring/matronly on hanger looked the best on my body). Keep in mind, I almost never wear dresses - making this an extra bad choice - but I don't know if the club allows nice jeans and everything else in my size was too "office" or casual. Options for fat people are really limited - nice when you don't want to spend money; sucky when you want to look good.
  

• Came home to find that the housekeepers didn't come today. My phone had 4 missed calls from Juan, the owner of the business, but not a single message. I don't know if the key wouldn't work, or they had a bigger client ask them to clean for Tday, or what. Like I said, no message. I'm already annoyed with them (don't think they've mopped the floors since their first visit - about 6 months ago; they've never wiped down the counter backsplashes; and they never clean the windows or refrig - even if I've gone out of my way to make sure there's little else for them to do) so I think it's time I start asking around about other services.
  

• Anxiety continued to build to a minor panic out about getting ready for the club party... prep time getting shorter & shorter (in reality, I had a couple hours to get ready & to drive there) and I was less & less in the mood to deal with it. Result - physical paralysis due to mental hyperactivity (thinking instead of doing).
  

• Decided to take a shower in hope that I'd chill out a bit

• While showering, I realized I was planning to take a xanax to relax, followed by a speed pill to stay awake, followed by drinks at the bar to take off the edge from the pill, followed by driving after drinking (the speed pill might have kept me coherent enough to drive but there would also be extra amounts of drunk drivers to avoid - and extra cops to catch all of us), followed by a pain pill once home (cause clubbing would surely have wrecked my knees) and probably another xanax to get to sleep. All because I didn't want to flake on Nicole AGAIN.

• I realized that flaking on Nicole AGAIN was a much healthier option - esp when vegging and early-to-bed sound super appealing. So that's what I did (or am doing). I've never been a total flake to someone before, to anyone, but I almost always standing her up (but only when I know there are tons of other people showing; I would never flake on someone if it was 1:1). I'm not proud but realized it's kind of fun being on the other side of this experience for a change (people routinely flake on me)! I'm going to stop RSVPing YES to her events so I won't be a flake anymore - and maybe I'll be the happy surprise by showing up when not expected!!
  

I never made reservations for Thanksgiving dinner anywhere. In fact, I never even bothered to find out which restaurants are going to be open and/or serving Tday dinners tomorrow. So my guess is that I won't be having another turkey dinner; more likely fast food or nothing (the only food I have in the house is protein bars)... which is perfectly cool by me. Though rum or vodka, LOTS of rum or vodka, sounds really good. Wish I had some now!

Happy Thankgiving to all the US peeps. Happy Thursday to those not in the US!!

Love:

• Art & Tea (aka: Alice in Paris), upon hearing that I had not rec'd a package in the "15 Things Swap" took it upon herself to put together a package (after already having assembled & sent the one she was assigned to), so that I would not be left out of the exchange. Not only was this extremely generous spiritually but also financially - shipping alone was $20!!
  
• Pics of the "15 Things" to follow - my web enabled phone is MIA at the moment so I had to take them with the old phone
  
• Said package arrived at a perfect time as a lot of events and experiences had combined so that my mental status was (is?) 90% negative and I had recently decided NOT to give to charities this holiday season. Not a penny!! Her act of kindness restored my faith in (some of) humanity enough so that, today, I donated Tday dinners for 6 local families.... that's 24 people getting a free meal thanks to her.
  

• Some of the items she sent were just perfect for me (I've been planning to buy a new, heat-resistant spatula - but she sent one!). One made me laugh cause it was so off base (a kitchen scrubbie... we all know I don't clean!! lol (I'm sure the housekeepers will put it to good use.))

My totally lame, not getting it, newest "assistant" coworker was finally reassigned today. He said something in a meeting that caused our boss to finally realize how thoroughly he is just not "getting it" and that the price of keeping him on the project is losing her fastest tester (me - and the fastest tester part was her words).

Does anyone else watch Conan O'Brien? The Cody Devereaux and WolfBoy stuff (making fun of Twilight New Moon) is cracking me up. Tonight's, featuring Jerry Springer, was particularly ridiculous. But, man, that WolfBoy is some kind of YEEEE-UUUUMMMM! (even though Conan's right - he never blinks!) I keep wondering if he gogo dances anywhere in town. I want to leek him!!

Disconnecting my doorbell might be the best thing I've done in months.

Nicole is going to be pole dancing at Red nightclub (costa mesa / corona del mar) on Wed night. I'm on the guest list.

I thought I'd be working all weekend but in a fluke of circumstances, there will be no work to do. So I think the whole team is going to get a 4day weekend, like we're supposed to.

Miss Kitty's annual White Trash Ball is Saturday Friday night. (shit, I thought it was Sat. Good thing I just checked!!) I was thinking of wearing beer cans as hair curlers but I'll probably just go in street clothes - definitely so if I hit the BlackFriday sales in the early AM (I only have about $700 in items I want to buy myself).

BlackFriday falls on a "mortgage" paycheck so I won't be indulging anywhere near the extent I'm pretending to. Probably no diamond jewelry and that awesome TV deal at Target is also up in the air (I really don't need it - it's just an amazing price).

I have another physical therapy appt in a week (they were booked up this week).

I have plenty of xanax and pain pills.

Yesterday I survived 5 hrs of sleep followed by 8 hours of traffic school followed by an anxiety attack, a housewarming party, and meeting a friend at a bar.

Traffic school wasn't too bad. 30 students were enrolled, 7 attended. One got kicked out for not having his paperwork. He arrived back, just in time, with his papers - only to be kicked out again for not having his cash fee. Total retard.

Around 3p, probably because of being tired, the anxiety attack started hitting me. Nothing specific, just general anxiety. Mild but building. By the time I got home, I was too wound up to do anything (like get ready for the party I was supposed to be at in an hour). I finally gave myself a time out, took a shower, then a xanax, and watched a half hour of crappy TV. I got ready for the party (coworker's housewarming) and arrived around the same time as all the other "adults" (30 and over). Note to asian peeps: If you're going to make people take their shoes off to walk in your house, please notify us whities ahead of time. Fortunately, I had coordinated my socks and I was actually a lot more comfy without my stylish boots. But, really, walking through a pile of shoes upon entering (there was no coordination to where the were set and you literally had to walk through the pile) was pretty gross. Not a great first impression.

I gave the coworker his present but was disappointed that he didn't open it. It was an assortment of crappy (1) to really really good (about 5) mini bottles of whiskey (total of 10 bottles), with a highball glass, in mixing bowls. I gave him the rest of the highball glasses in another container (the day before the party I learned that he has a shortage of glasswear) and the mixing bowls were a joke based on overhearing him on a call with his mother, where he told her (about a billion times), "we don't need bowls. We have plenty of bowls. We have too many bowls. No... we don't need bowls!" So I told all the work invitees to get him bowls. 2 days before the party, his roommate (who also works with us) said he actually needs mixing bowls so I got a set of those to be nice but still satisfy my "need" to get him bowls.  Toward the end of the night, he introduced me to friends as his "coolest coworker". That felt nice!

I left the party at a reasonable hour (9:30) and met Julie, who lives nearby, for drinks at a bar. We hung out, talking about nothing in particular till around 1am. Long day for me. I'm surprised I had so much energy. That was offset by sleeping till 2:30p today - which felt AWESOME.

I let the cats out back to play, started some laundry, and tried to install the new doorbell. But 3 pieces on the doorbell assembly were broken, and it needs all kinds of new mounting holes & screws - which ain't gonna happen while I don't have a power drill (that's another Target black friday special... 18v B&D cordless drill for $39.99, lowest price around), and I'm really uncertain about whether the old wiring will work (there are the required 2 wires but I don't know what goes to what and if the 2 wires are the same 2 wires I'm supposed to have). So I gave up that project, leaving the annoying buzzer unhooked so that, at present, people can only bug me by knocking (awesome!). I might just exchange this POS bell set for a wireless doorbell. I'm not sure - but I really liked the one I had at my last apt.

I was going to do returns and nails and buy cat supplies today but it's nearly 5, the sun is setting, it's getting cold, all I've eatten is a protein bar, I'm still in my PJs, and the loads of laundry need to be swapped. So the new plan is to deal with the laundry, take a quick shower, then head out for cat food, litter and some human food. There's a Home Depot in the same complex as PetSmart so I could return stuff there - but I really hate that one (it's more for contractors than DIYs). OR... I just remembered that there's a new PetCo in the same lot as the nicer Home Depot (frankly, I prefer Lowe's but it's out of the way) - maybe I should check it out. I wonder if they sell prescription cat food.

I seriously cannot believe Tday and Black Friday are NEXT WEEK. I honestly thought they were still weeks, maybe a couple months, away. I'm a little freaked out that "the holidays are upon us" and I'm even less interested than usual (and "usual" is pretty little). Local radio station, KBIG, which is known for a month of non-stop Christmas music has already started... either last week or on Friday... WTF?!?!

I never got my physical therapy rescheduled and the combo of cold temps and lack of exercise is making my knees lock up again. Must get on the ball about that! And back to aqua aerobics too! I was finally well enough to attend last week but had other pre-work errands calling on me every day so I never made it.

Work is pretty sucky right now but it's just because of an intense workload, obviously unrealistic deadline (which I'm still trying to meet), totally shitty new coworker who the boss won't reassign (she's told me to make him better but it's clear he just doesn't have the brain/skills for this particular type of work - and correcting his work is taking so much time that I'm unable to be productive myself), the software team seems unwilling to accept that I am the product GUI expert and won't implement my corrections without a team meeting (yet implemented a field tech's request without asking anybody if it was okay, which it wasn't), the FDA is on site (routine audit), and everyone is generally grumpy. I think we're gonna need more chocolate.

Okay... time for laundry, shower & shop. And FOOD. Dammmn, I am hungry!! (speaking of which, as suspected, the steroid induced over-eating and lack of exercise have led to a 5lb weight gain. I am now the heaviest EVER, of my entire life. Boo!)

Did someone say, "buy a bottle of booze and have some drinks tonight"?? I thought you did!

Tday dinner #3

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Not to bad. The instructor is easy to distract onto other topics. I learned that it IS legal to cross a solid double yellow if there's only one lane on each side. 3hrs to go.

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And I think that someone is Mitchell.

I've had an odd feeling about it for a couple weeks now cause the cats were no longer in my backyard at night and I was hearing new, louder, odd sounds at night. And Mitchell's been keeping stuff around here (sans permission).

I have a raised foundation with a ventilation screen, about the size of a person, that is missing (I leave it that way for the cats). But... nahhhh, who would actually crawl under my house instead of going to a shelter?! It must be raccoons (I recently heard some having a huge fight at night) or opossums.

Tonight I came home and heard the common bumps-in-the-dark coming from under the house. But I stayed in the bathroom for a bit and heard a new rustling... rustling that sounded like newspapers or plastic wrap being spread out. And the sound was coming from an area just below/behind the bathroom.

It could still be animals. But I'm thinking that animal is homo sapien.

I REALLY don't feel like dealing with it right now so I'm not going out with a flashlight to find out. I am gonna be HELLA PISSED if I'm right. So send "be wrong" jujus.

The office cafeteria prepared a full Thanksgiving dinner for lunch today... turkey, gravy, stuffing, cranberry sauce, mashed potpots (potatoes), yams, veggies, roll, and a slice o' pie.

I bought an extra lunch for dinner. Even though I don't usually eat dinner. I like turkey that much. But I passed on the veggies (too many bell peppers in there), so the chef gave me an extra scoop of potpots. And they had run out of stuffing, so he gave me another extra scoop of potpots. That tray weighed a ton.

I ate the 2nd slice of pie with the first, around 2pm. I intended to take the dinner home but I was having a strange day, totally unable to focus on anything, so around 7p I got my turkey + ton of potatoes out of the fridge and ate them. Gonna regret that around 3am when I wake up to heartburn.

But I'll still want more turkey tomorrow. And I'll probably get it (in the form of a sandwich). Speaking of which: my happy moment for last week was finding out that 7eleven has added "Tday dinner" sandwiches to their Fresh Express line (they're good sandwiches!!). Yum!.

I'm also having Tday dinner at a housewarming party on Sat night. Thank gawd I luuuvs me some turkaayyy!

In other news: Not much.

On the way to work today, I saw a truck for Spud.com, which I later learned is a grocery delivery service. When I checked my email, Groupon had a 50% coupon for the same service, which turns out to be organic foods. Art&Tea has glowed about her organic produce service so I signed up and am going to try having local/organic produce delivered to my house (cause I wake up too late for any of the gabillion farmer's markets around here). I don't expect it to work out for me (either someone will steal the deliveries, or I won't eat them, or I'll realize I am paying WAY too much for food I could be buying myself (but don't))... but I'm trying it. I like the delivery and that they select the variety (but I got to use a checkbox system to veto or promote certain foods [veto brussels sprouts & cauliflower; promote corn & bananas]). I should eat well for at least a week - that's enough to lose 100lbs, right?

I'm working a lot (our major project finally hit... only 3 or 6 or 10 months later than planned, but the goal is still year end) and have been getting home late (usually 11p or later) to kitties who loved being outside during the day but are unhappy in the nighttime cold. I guess also because of colder temps, they've been sleeping in for the past week or 2.. or sometimes one will go out, pee, then want right back in to sleep some more. It used to be that Boo started bitching to go out around 5a then Moshi would join in and I'd let them out at 6a. Today they both stayed in bed till my alarm clock went off - at 10!! I tried to convince them to go back to sleep and stay indoors but they were having none of that.

I still haven't swapped out my door buzzer for the bell that I bought. Come to think of it, what did I do with that stuff? Is it still in the car? Noooo... cause a hinge I bought (to fix a table) is definitely in the dining room. Hmmm, it will probably be a lot easier to install the bell if I know where it is. Well, Sat is pretty swamped anyway - all day traffic school [for speeding back in... March? May?], then a coworkers' housewarming party. So maybe I'll take care of it on Sunday. I'm due for a pedi but might put that off another week. I dunno... work has used up every iota of my caring about anything. Most overheard phrase at my desk: "Oh...do whatever you want. I really don't care anymore. Seriously!"

Speaking of which (episode 2): Do you think disappointment in virtual everyone/everything (INTENSE disappointment, to the level that you really can't get past it or get over it and are quite happy being isolated in solitude as much as possible cause then there's no new stuff to be disappointing) is a symptom of depression, a trigger to depression, a reaction to depression, or just a coincidence?

In semi-caring about something news: I read that LOST returns on Feb 2. Mark your calendars. I also read that Sheila Kelley (founder of S Factor) has a recurring role.

In totally caring about something news (well, maybe not totally since I've only given 2 of 4 their flea meds and never put Skritches on her cold meds [she got better without them so that was an expensive exercise in futility] and don't change the litter box as often as I should): The kitties all seem well. Moshi had marks of having been in a fight yesterday but I don't know if it was outdoors or with one of his housemates and I think it was only minor injuries. Skritches is constantly cracking me up with her silliness. Espressa likes sleeping under the covers, spooning with me. Boo came by a few min ago and walked all over me while purring - that makes me suspicious.

Is a life without Eggos worth living?